DEPARTED FROM
London, England
ARRIVED IN
Boston, Massachusetts
YEAR
1986
AGE
14
TRANSCRIPT
TRANSCRIBED BY Simrin Shah (x 2)
On behalf of SAADA, I wanted to thank you for participating in this interview for the First Days Project. If you could please introduce yourself and tell us what you remember from your first few days in the United States.
My name is Sonalee Kapoor. When I came to the United States, my name was Sonalee Patel. I came here January 2nd, 1986; we moved from England. We lived in a town called Preston in the UK, and we moved from London to Boston, Massachusetts. What I remember of that first time—I remember landing with—oh my God, I think we had like, 18 boxes, and that was our entire lives packed into these big, big boxes. And I remember my uncle, my dad's brother, and my cousin, his oldest son, Kinjal, coming to pick us up at the airport. I think for me, I was 14, not so excited about moving to a new country, leaving a lot of my friends behind. But also, this nervous energy. I remember getting picked up, and we got picked up in a station wagon [laughs]. And honestly, it was like one of the biggest cars I'd ever seen. Growing up in England, which is a small island, everything was small, from our homes to our cars. Even when we got to their house, I thought their house was a mansion, and looking back now, like a split level, it's a bi-level. So, it's not even a big house, but back then for us, it was huge. And we were excited. It was winter in New England, which we were excited about, because we thought, oh, we'd see snow, and it would be normal American winters, and we were so excited at first, but of course, that first day, no snow, but it was cold. I remember going to the house, and I think it was a weekend, because I remember my uncle saying, “Oh, you know, when it's Monday, I'm gonna enroll you in school, because then the Christmas holidays are over, and you get to go to school.” And he goes, “You'll be in high school”, and I think my sister would be in elementary or middle school.
I remember just [pause], kind of nervous about starting a new school. Halfway through ninth grade, it was January. But I remember him taking me, and my parents didn't even come with me. It was just my uncle coming to take me to the high school. I remember going to the principal's office, and they wanted to figure out where to place me and what classes, and they were looking at my report cards from England. And when you look at a report card from England, if you get a score of between a 70 and 80, it's an A. That's just because it was so difficult to get. No one scored over 80-85. A 75, I would say, was like an A. Just trying to take my transcript, trying to figure out where to go, put me in what classes. They figured out what classes I was going to go in, and as far as French went— I remember, in England, I was in conversational French, so I could speak it pretty well. Not that I can remember anything today, but back then, I could speak it pretty well. And so when the French teacher came in and take me to my interview, she goes, “Wow, she should be in like, French two or French three.” So they said, “Let's start her in French two and see how she does.”
They got me my whole schedule, and then I remember the principal calling one girl from the ninth grade and said, “Hey, this girl is from England. She's new. Show her around. Make sure you pick her up after each class, take her to her next class, show her her locker, and then have lunch with her, just kind of help her through the day.” I have to be honest, I can't remember the girl's name for the life of me, but I remember her really trying, taking me to each class. And I thought the school was huge, huge. I mean, I remember the locker. I never had a locker before, and I couldn't open it. It was the biggest tedious thing ever. And I would be at my locker for 10-15 minutes just trying to open it in between classes [laughs], and you know. She helped me a few times, and then I had lunch with her and her friends. But I have to tell you, I stuck out like a sore thumb with the accent. You know, it was definitely—everyone kept saying, “Can you say that again?” And almost they wanted to hear me talk. I remember in English class, I would always get picked on to read out aloud, because everybody wanted to hear the accent. So I hated it, hated it, wanted to lose the accent. I think for me, it was a little bit nerve wracking. I remember just like trying to rush to make the bus home. I know my first day I just made it on the bus, and didn't have anywhere to sit. I didn't know anybody, so I ended up seeing my cousin. I sat next to him, he wasn't very happy about it, but got home and mom's like, “How was your first day?” And I was like, “Eh, it was okay.” Had a whole bunch of homework, and did it the best I could. I remember going to French class the first day. They had a pop quiz. I didn't know how to conjugate one verb, because in England, it was all conversational. So I know I failed that first quiz, and it was just— I think I had a hard, hard time. And I think the worst memory I have of my first week in school was I got stuck at the locker at the end of the day. I missed the bus home, so I go outside thinking it's still waiting for me, like it's gonna wait for me. Like “It's not gonna leave without me.” I go outside and there are no school buses. I just sat down, and I was like, “Okay, now what do I do?” I don't know the phone number to my aunt's house. I know the address, 150 Pennsylvania Avenue. That's all I can remember. I look, the school is closed, people are leaving. There's some people trickling out. I literally just sat outside trying to figure out what to do. I don't have any money. I don't know how to use a pay phone. I don't know their phone number. Back then there were no cell phones. People just knew where they were going. I sat, I have to say, it was about 45 minutes, and then this one girl comes out, and she's sitting outside too waiting for her ride. And I just went up to her, and I think she was in detention. I went up to her, and I said, “I missed the bus. I'm new here. I don't have a ride home. I don't know. I don't have the phone number.” And she just looked at me, she goes, “Okay, no worries, my sister's picking me up. I'll give you a ride home.” And I was just like, oh! A random act of kindness. And it was just so funny, her sister picks us up, and she goes, “What's the address?” I said, “150 Pennsylvania Avenue.” She goes, “Oh my God, I don't know where that is.” She's asking all these questions, “Is it off of this street? Is it off at that street?” And I'm like, “I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.” I think I was in the car with her for an hour. The poor girl drove me around the whole like town trying to find me home.
And she got me home, and I walked in, and my mom goes, “Where were you!?” You know, they're all worried, because I literally came home, like an hour and a half and maybe two hours late. I said, “You never gave me money. You don't tell me what the phone number is. How do you expect someone to know?” And they all looked at me just saying, “Oh, yeah, we should have done that.” I look back and I'm thinking, “Wow, you send someone off.” Because parents back then—life was easy. I don't think anyone really worried. Today, we worry about our kids. We make sure everything's done. “Oh, do you have this? Do you have that?” No, my parents just kind of “Eh, go to school!” I remember that was one of the funniest— I mean, it's funny now, but back then, it was nerve wracking.
What were some of the biggest cultural differences or cultural similarities that you noticed?
I think coming from England, language was not an issue, because we can definitely speak English. Communication, I think, was actually very easy, just the accent was a little off. Culturally, I would say some of the words that were a little funny. My cousins would always say “awesome” or “weird,” and that wasn't something that we ever said. But guess what? We caught on and we started saying those same words. Culturally… I think we, because we were young, we kind of assimilated pretty fast. I made some friends in high school. You kind of pick up little antics, little ways that they speak, the little ways that they do things. I think you assimilate easier when you're younger. I think my parents were probably a little bit tougher, but for us, I don't think it was that tough. And I think I made a friend that lived on the street next to my uncle. I was there every day after school, just because it was just someone new, and you kind of learned the whole American way. We dress similar, we talk similar. Food was a little different. I feel like America had a lot of fast food, in school even. I don't think school lunches are healthy at all. I think I ate fries mostly every day, unless I took a peanut butter jelly sandwich. That was new for me, peanut butter jelly. I never saw the combination in my life in England. Most of our sandwiches were like pâté. My dad used to always buy us pâté. Can you imagine pâté sandwiches, and here we're eating peanut butter jelly. So that was a little bit of a downgrade [laughs].
Is there any specific memory that you're surprised you remember?
At 14, you'd still have a pretty good memory. You remember a lot of things. I remember kids being pretty kind. For someone who was from a different country, it's not like—I was only in this, my first school, for six months because then my parents moved to a different town, so I just restarted a new high school. But one thing about Americans: they were pretty friendly. I never felt like I didn't belong. I mean, listen, I had a very sheltered upbringing in the sense in England, but here my dad and mom, they wanted us to kind of settle in. I remember being able to go to my friend, Christine's house every day, and she lived on the next street, so it was just a quick walk over. And they had— they never questioned it. When Christine says, “Oh, let's go to my brother's baseball game,” my parents never questioned it. They definitely gave us a lot of leeway. But culturally, I think it was very easy for us.
Is there anything else you'd like to share about your first days?
My first days. I think I was so excited about the snow. And when it did snow, I hated it. Hated it, hated it. Because I think it snowed like a good foot, and just cleaning off the snow, going to school in that, I was like, “Okay, I'm over the snow”, and still, I still don't like it, but it's pretty when it falls. But I think the first days, just settling in, you realize that you are blessed to be in this country. It took me many years to kind of figure that out, but I think back then, as kids, you just kind of roll with the punches. You just kind of go with it. Yep.
Thank you so much for participating and sharing your story!
Oh, thank you.
