TRANSCRIPT
Hi, Manju.
Hello.
I'm so excited to get to talk to you about your first days.
Oh, thank you so much for having me here. I'm excited to share it.
My first question is, what do you remember about your first days in the United States?
Okay, first day. I would say it was night when we got picked up from the airport, I believe it was Manchester, New Hampshire, where we got picked up by another Bhutanese caseworker. And I remember being dropped off, I believe, at my great aunt and uncle's home, because they were already here. And then I just remember being introduced to their daughter. I had seen her in Nepal once, just before they left back in probably 2008 or 2009. But yeah, I just remember getting picked up at the airport.
Do you remember what you did in your first couple of weeks?
First couple of weeks, since it was June, we arrived here June 18. I think I just played with my great uncle's daughter—in our culture, because she's cousin of my mom, so I do have to call her auntie—but since she's little bit younger than me, we just call each other by our names. So I just remember playing with her, and just walking around the area that we stayed in. So just a little bit of exploration. And then I also remember another school staff from within our Bhutanese community, he took me and then two other Bhutanese youth to school, Rundlett Middle School in Concord, to kind of show us that oh, this is the school that you guys will be attending in the fall. So, yeah, those were the first couple two weeks of memories.
What about your first days at middle school? What was that like?
Ooh, it was little bit of tough because of the language barrier back then. But I'm just looking back now, I'm also grateful that I did have other Nepali speaking youth, and then also other international students who are also learning English as their second language with me. But I just remember being sort of lost whenever my American friends talk to me, or even the teachers, and me and my other friend were given a tutor who helped us work on our projects and class schoolwork. So, yeah, language barrier definitely was a little bit huge, um, [pause] how should I say it? I think that made it a little bit difficult to get along with the friends.
What was the first thing you ate that was brand new to you?
Brand new...I feel like school lunch. It was definitely different to what I was used to eating at home. But I remember specifically when, I think that summer in 2012, I was part of this nursing program for like couple weeks, I remember asking my friend—so we were at this cafe, and then there was pizza, and I did not know what it was called, or anything. So I remember asking, “What is this?” And then they said, “It's pizza.” And I was like, “What is pizza?” And then they were like, “You should try it.” And then I did. I think I remember liking it back then. So I think that was one of the foods that I remember being like, “Oh, this is so new, and it tastes good too.”
Was there anything that surprised you that you saw or heard?
I think seeing, you know, people who didn't look like me in terms of… because I think most of my life back in Nepal, I just grew up seeing people who look like me, like brown, right? But here, that was one thing. And then also, I think the clothing as well, like seeing them wear bikinis and all those, and I was like, ooh, we can't really do that in my culture, right? I think those were the most shocking things I think I remember seeing.
Were there any cultural similarities or differences that you noticed?
Cultural similarities…that's a good question, similarities and differences?
Similarities or differences.
That might take me…well, I think there was definitely a lot of differences. Definitely one would be just off of my head, you know how in South Asian cultures, grandparents, they stay with us. But I think having friends later on, as I got to know more other, non-South Asian American friends, of seeing some of the families, like how their grandparents stayed away, or they had their own space and stuff. I think that was even until now, to this day, I think that's something that's like, okay, I do compare, I still have my grandmother at my home. So something that I noticed is they stay separate from their families. And again, it’s not like I'm not trying to say it was a bad thing or anything like that. But yeah, one difference, I think.
Is there anything else about your first days that you'd like to share, or weeks or months or year?
Yes, I actually wrote a poem last year. It was about this. I think it must have been after a couple of months of me and my family arriving to U.S. that we had received [pause] I should be able to tell this. So we had received this hateful letter from I believe it was couple of the youth in my neighborhood. It was really painful back then to translate it to my mom, because I had to do that. So I wrote a poem last year, when I was working with my friend here on a storytelling project and then, that's just kind of, it was my way of getting over that hurt back then. So I would like to share that poem today. Yes.
Thank you so much, yeah please share.
Okay, sorry. I'm just, I feel like, since I'm revisiting that moment, I think it just kind of it might bring up some emotions, but okay, the title is, “A Letter to my Neighbor.”
I am the daughter of a refugee, born in a refugee camp amidst the beautiful intricacy of struggles and dreams. No matter where I am in life, I learn to adapt, no matter the unwelcome hate, I learn to forgive, but never forget.
No matter the words you sound, like, “Go back to your own country!” I will move forward with grace, because I am the daughter of a refugee. You call me an outsider in this indigenous land, but you forget you are a settler. So no matter the words you throw to stomp me down, I will always find a way to stand back up, regardless of your words, like “You don't belong here!” they don't tear me down anymore. You don't tear me down anymore. Because I'm the daughter of a refugee, the daughter who was born as a refugee in her own ancestral land.
No matter where I am or where I go, I will find my community that embraces my identity, the community who understands my struggles and stories. Because, after all, I'm the daughter of a refugee, the daughter who was destined to lead. And like my ancestor, resilience flows through my veins, and like the changing seasons, I allow myself to mold into new beginnings, because I'm the daughter of a refugee taught to move with compassion through seasons of life.
Thank you.
I thought I was done crying over this, but I think the memories are still fresh, even though it's been what, 10–11 years?
Thank you so much for your willingness to share that, Manju. Thank you so much for your courage in sharing that. Thank you so much for being willing to revisit a very hard place. And what I heard in that was such strength, such perseverance, such power, and such beauty. Thank you so much.
Thank you. Yeah, and I think one of the reasons I decided to share this is because the community that showed up then, to represent that there was no place for hate, right? Even though those—I think the people who wrote that letter, I think they were teenagers and youth, they didn't know. And so I do forgive them, but I will never be able to forget that moment, and I think being part of the community still here in PA, it has helped me to revisit that moment in my life.
And it has empowered me to be okay with sharing that hurt, and heal from it—which I have, I think today, just kind of revisiting, it just made me a little bit emotional. But people who are listening from different communities, I just want them to know that, even though you might meet some of those people who might hurt you, unknowingly or knowingly, but there will still be community of people who will support you and who will rise with you. Thank you so much.
Thank you, Manju.
